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From the collective symptoms, it seems I have reversed my polarity, no longer am I attracted to shiny metal objects, or glittering and jingly things meant to occupy menial minds...for a time, for money, for the future.
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There is plenty of pull to go around, I've taken the slack, sometimes defiantly looking back at others as they rest peacefully in overstuffed beds made tight and I, not on my back, look up at the big top, blurring my eyes and the ceiling comes together over me. In observance, this is where the mystery of me is dissolved.
***
I occupy my space in another time not taken and I wonder if I stole it, will it be collected in the back end, build up like wax and wonder secretly if twenty hour days are ways to die faster forgetting to eat, feeding on famished fuel and forgone poisons. Pleasure is more pungent.
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I have not an after taste of bitter since awake, my circadian clock keeps its own tempo on my time left. I live most fully while others are dreaming in real life.
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